Thursday, December 24, 2009

Question and Answer Christmas Jokes

 Q: What do elves learn in school?

A: The Elf-abet!

Q: What's the most popular wine at Christmas?
A: "I don't like sprouts" !

Q: If athletes get athletes foot, what do astronauts get?
A: Missletoe!

Q: What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?
A: Frostbite.

Q: Why was Santa's little helper depressed?
A: Because he had low elf esteem.

Q: Why does Santa have 3 gardens?
A: So he can ho-ho-ho.

Q: Where do polar bears vote?
A: The North Poll.

Q: What do you get when you cross an archer with a gift-wrapper?
A: Ribbon hood.

Q: Why do birds fly south for the winter ?
A: Because it's to far to walk.

Q: What was wrong with the boy's brand new toy electric train set he received for Christmas?
A: Forty feet of track - all straight!

Q: What kind of bird can write?
A: A PENguin.

Q: How does Al Gore's household keep Christmas politically correct?
A: On Christmas morning, they give the presents TO the tree.

Q: What do you call a cat on the beach at Christmas time?
A: Sandy Claus!

Q: How do sheep in Mexico say Merry Christmas?
A: Fleece Navidad!

Q: What nationality is Santa Claus?
A: North Polish.

Q: Why does Santa's sled get such good mileage?
A: Because it has long-distance runners on each side.

Q: What do you call a bunch of grandmasters of chess bragging about their games in a hotel lobby?
A: Chess nuts boasting in an open foyer!

Q: What do you get if you deep fry Santa Claus?
A: Crisp Cringle.

Q: What did the ghosts say to Santa Claus?
A: We'll have a boo Christmas without you.

Q: What did Santa shout to his toys on Christmas Eve?
A: Okay everyone, sack time!!

Q: What do snowmen eat for breakfast?
A: Snowflakes.

Q: If Santa Claus and Mrs. Claus had a child, what would he be called?
A: A subordinate claus.

Q: Why did the elf push his bed into the fireplace?
A: He wanted to sleep like a log.

Q: Why did Santa spell Christmas N-O-E?
A: Because the angel had said, "No L!"

Q: What goes Ho, Ho, Swoosh, Ho, Ho, Swoosh?
A: Santa caught in a revolving door!

Q: Why does Santa Claus go down the chimney on Christmas Eve?
A: Because it " soots " him!

Q: What do you do if Santa gets stuck in your chimney?
A: Pour Santa flush on him.

Q: Did you hear that one of Santa's reindeer now works for Proctor and Gambel?
A: Its true . . . Comet cleans sinks!

Q: What do you call people who are afraid of Santa Claus?
A: Claustrophobic.

Q: Why does Scrooge love Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer?
A: Because every buck is dear to him.

Q: How come you never hear anything about the 10th reindeer "Olive" ?
A: Yeah, you know, "Olive the other reindeer, used to laugh and call him names"

Q: Why did the little girl change her mind about buying her grandmother a packet of handkerchiefs for Christmas?Q: Olive ?
A: Yeah, you know, "Olive the other reindeer, used to laugh and call him names"

Q: Why is Christmas just like a day at the office?
A: You do all the work and the fat guy with the suit gets all the credit.

Q: Olive?
A: Yeah, you know, "Olive the other reindeer, used to laugh and call him names"

Q: What was so good about he neurotic doll the girl was given for Christmas?
A: It was wound up already.

Q: What's a good holiday tip?
A: Never catch snowflakes with your tongue until all the birds have gone south for the winter.


Submit Your Site To The Web's Top 50 Search Engines for Free! Search Engine Submission - AddMe ExactSeek - Submit 4 FREE Search Engine Marketing & Optimization
Join My Community at MyBloglog! Humor Top Blogs Humor (Blogs) - TOP.ORG Blog Flux Directory Personal Blogs - Blog Catalog Blog Directory blog directory blog search directory TopOfBlogs Blogs lists and reviews Blog Directory blogarama - the blog directory Blog Search, Blog Directory

My Blog List


video (6) Adult joke (3) Cat in Heaven (2) Christmas Jokes (2) Pictures (2) airplane jokes (2) funny Pictures (2) marriage joke (2) 2 Chick In One Halloween (1) A Grooms Tale (1) AXE Musicstar Limousine (1) Advantages Of Being A Woman (1) Americans are NOT stupid (1) Beach Joke (1) Beach Pictures (1) Better relationship (1) Big Girls Fly (1) Britney Spears (1) Caught in the Action (1) Changes with Each Baby (1) Cheating Wife (1) Cheese and Liver (1) Chick Soccer (1) Chinese New Year Jokes (1) Chris Porter (1) Chris Rock (1) Christmas Eve Jokes (1) Clean Jokes (1) Climbing Game Show (1) Clothing (1) Daddy Phone Call (1) Dancing Walrus (1) Divorce Joke (1) Divorce Story (1) Dr Philbilly (1) Facts Of Life (1) Fake Shark (1) Football bloopers (1) Funny Cartoon - Wife Tries to Seduce Husband (1) Funny Commercials (1) Funny Computer Gadgets (1) Funny Jackie Chan in Mask (1) Funny SMS (1) Funny Sexy ads compilation (1) Funny Stories (1) Funny TV Ads (1) Game Of Intelligence (1) Girls (1) Girls Confession (1) Greeting Cards (1) Honeymoon (1) Horse Jokes (1) Horse Party (1) Husbands for Sale (1) IKEA sell CAR (1) Japanese funny (1) Japanese Dinner Argument (1) Japanese Stair (1) Kisses (1) Korean Girl (1) Like Father Like Son (1) Lingerie (1) Marry Again (1) Men VS Women (1) Mike Tyson (1) Naked in the Office (1) New Job (1) Not for the sensitive (1) Nurse Jokes (1) Nurse Pictures (1) Parenting Joke (1) Plastic Man (1) Relationship Joke (1) Repeat (1) Rikku (1) SEX FACTS (1) Sailormoon (1) Samsung Extreme Sheep LED Art (1) Scan Your Breast (1) Secret Box (1) Sex Change (1) Sexy Girl With Monster Burps (1) Sexy Girl With Sensitive Teeth (1) Sexy Lady (1) Sexy Oranges (1) Shopping for a Husband (1) Short Stories (1) Sleep To Night (1) Songs (1) Student Joke (1) Stupid Man On Earth (1) Surgery joke (1) TICKLED TO DEATH (1) Tax Control (1) Team Work (1) The Blonde Flight Attendant (1) The Middle Wife (1) They walk among us (1) Toilet Joke (1) Trouble sleeping (1) True Headlines (1) Valentine Day Jokes (1) WOMAN'S PERFECT BREAKFAST (1) Waxing Funny (1) Women (1) Women Jokes (1) Wonderbra (1) affair (1) bad breath (1) banned commercial (1) beach sexy joke (1) boy (1) bride (1) britney spears official website (1) career joke (1) cat (1) childrean (1) christmas jokes for kids (1) cliff jumps (1) crazy phone (1) demotivational poster (1) denominational poster (1) dentist jokes (1) detegent (1) duck and cat (1) duck jokes for kids (1) ducking (1) ducking jokes (1) entainment (1) family joke (1) funny (1) funny ads (1) funny birthday wishes (1) funny name to call people (1) ghost joke (1) girl (1) golf (1) gum diseases (1) humor (1) husband and wife (1) jokes from jail (1) just for laugh (1) kancil (1) malaysian jokes (1) marriage (1) mother joke (1) neelofa sebelum berhijab (1) neelofa zouk (1) news (1) retail problems (1) romantic joke (1) scary face cashier (1) sexy women (1) soap (1) sport jokes (1) stupid video (1) sweetheart (1) tCommercials for tonic drink (1) tooth (1) tudung (1) usic · Sex · Mechanics (1) vagina (1) when see a ghost (1) wife (1) wisdom jokes (1) wisdom tooth (1) zombie (1)